DBDH ARENA 3 INTERVIEW

DH's Note: As you should know by now, all DBDH Arena fights and interviews are exaggerated parodies of old message board arguments. When I re-read this before putting it up, I realized that I made it sound like DS is very anti-Sega, but in reality, that's not the case. Just wanted to make that clear. ~DH

DB: Hello, everybody and welcome to DBDH Arena! I'm your hostess, DOVEBLOB. We are now backstage with today's guests. Let's say hello to them, shall we?

The camera pans over to the interview area, where several people are seated on the sofa.

DB: For our first gust this evening, you know him as the M.C of the DST and the founder of the Hitmons, a man who truly needs no introductions: outcastdeathspork!

The crowd cheers and DS waves.

DB: For our second guest...you may remember him, he made a brief appearance on our last show...it's the Mystery VI Guy! Say hello, Mystery Guy!

The crowd boos at the Mystery Guy, who is wearing sheets and hood over his head.

MG: F*ckity, f*ckity, f*ck, f*ck you!!

DB: And our last guest, who has recently started on a new website: Hitmongaimeguy!

The crowd cheers again.

GG: Hey, thanks! Now please go visit my site!

DB: Okay, let's start the interview. DS, what are some of your thoughts on......uh...Gaimeguy, what are you doing.

Gaimeguy quickly hides something behind his back.

GG: Huh? Oh, nothing.

DB: Ummm....okay..

GG: It's not a bomb!!!

DB: Oh, okay, *AHEM*..where was I, oh yeah, DS, what are some of your thoughts on the three major game companies: Nintendo, Sega, and Sony.

DS: Well, as you probably already know, Nintendo is the best of the three, hands down. Sony makes crappy systems and games, and I can think of several reasons why Sega sucks!

MG: Hey, f*ck you, asshole!

DB: Umm.excuse me, sir! Can you wait your turn, please? And let's not spontaneously insult people, either!

MG: It's my RIGHT to insult people if I don't like their opinions!

DB: Well, as long as you're here, you have to play by my rules, understand?

MG: At VI we do whatever the f*ck we want!!!

DH (in the control room, mutters to herself): And you wonder why no one wants to go there..

DB: Well, this isn't VI.

MG: Grow up!! Not everything's gonna be nice here all the time!!

DB: IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, YOU'RE GONNA SEE JUST HOW TRUE THAT CAN BE!!!

GG: Hey, can you two go to my site right now? I've made lots of updates!

DB: Gaimeguy, what is that?

Gaimeguy quickly hides a bunch of tied-together red cylinders behind his back.

GG: Oh, that's...nothing.

DB: Mmmmm...hmmmmm....

GG: IT'S NOT A BOMB IF THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!

DS: Ladies, and gentlemen, let's calm down, please! Myserty Guy, what did I say that upset you?

MG: I'd like to know exactly why you think Sega sucks! I worship Sega! Sega does no wrong! All other game companies and life on the planet Earth is inferior to Sega! NO ONE disses Sega! Sega is God!

DS: Well, let's see here...False advertising, games that totally suck, systems and add-ons that they didn't support....

MG: OH, F*CK YOU!! F*CK, F*CK YOU, ASSHOLE!!! Systems and add-ons they didn't support!?! What about Nintendo?! What about the Power Glove?!

DS: First of all, the Power glove is an accessory that worked with almost all games, not an add-on. Secondly, it was not made by Nintendo, themselves, but rather, a third-person party...

MG: Oh, f*ck off!!! I'm leaving this place!! It's full of assholes and morons!!!

Suddenly, a loud explosion comes from off-camera!

GG's voice: THAT WASN'T A BOMB!

The Mystery Guy gets up to leave, but DB blocks his path and makes him sit back down!

DB: Mister, sit down! This interview isn't over yet!!

DS: I think you should let him leave. And didn't he say on the last show that he wasn't coming back?

MG: Yeah, go ahead and tell me to leave!! You fascist, KGB turd!!

DS: Look who is talking!! Insulting people for thinking differently from you and telling them to shut up? Don't you realize this is how things like Naziism and Fascism get started? I also might point out, you haven't been putting up a really decent counter-argument to anything I've said!

MG: You're gonna get it now, Spork-person!!

KA-BOOM!!!!!! Another explosion, this time filling the room with smoke! Everyone starts coughing. When the smoke clears, everyone is all charred over.

GG: I didn't mean for that to be a bomb!!!

DS: Gaimeguy, why don't you go beat up the Myths, or something?

GG: Okay, that sounds like fun! Remember to visit my site! Bye!

Gaimeguy leaves through the exit door. The Mystery Guy's sheets are all burned and tattered.

DB: *cough* *cough* I've had enough, you two will settle this in the arena!!

MG: Forget it, I'm leaving and never coming back!

DS: You've said that at least three times!!!

MG: This time I really mean it! I'll see you in the arena!!

DS: ????

GG (from far away): Remember to visit my site!!!! (*KA-BOOOOM!!*) .........That wasn't a bomb!!

DB (facing the camera, completely burned and charred all over): Well, there you have it, folks...Who will win the next DBDH Arena? Will it be Deathspork or Foulmoth? Stay tuned and find out. Goodnight!

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