GAME IDEAS BY FLYING OMELETTE

Along with being an accomplished Video Game Review writer, FO is also an excellent humorist. Some of her game ideas are really funny, and some are more serious. You can find a lot more of her work at Flying Omelette's Kitchen. Albert Einstein Odyssey Alien vs. Predaking Battle Clash 3 Beatle Adventure Racing Capcom vs. Squaresoft Don Pachi & Do Don Pachi Elemental Metal Guilty etc. Fire X Emblem Grade-"E"-us Last Samurai Zombie Nation Milon's Secret Castle RPG Mini-Game Mania Ninja Guy Den Optimus Primal Rage Organ Battle 64 Pidge Racer Ratchet and Ratchet Reggie-Lution 3D Resident Weevil Rise of the GoBots Rival Turd Tenchi Survivor Untitled Adventure Game

Albert Einstein Odyssey The Legend of E=MC Squared

Alien vs. Predaking Who will win? The Predacons or the Aliens? You can choose which to play as! The final battle pits Predaking against the Alien Queen. Either way, the Universe is screwed! Here's what the character select screen will look like:

Battle Clash 3 I think Battle Clash 3 would be a cool idea for GameCube or N64. Instead of using a gun or scope, you would just use the control stick to aim your "sights" at. (Sort of like the robot battles in Mystical Ninja.) It would have all the STs from Battle Clash and Metal Combat, as well as lots of new STs! I think there could be a special hidden mode where you get to fight against STs that are piloted by famous Nintendo Characters, like Mario, Bowser, Link, Samus, Kirby, etc. Can you imagine Ash Ketchum fighting in an ST shaped like a giant, mechanical Pikachu!!! Oh no!!!

Beatle Adventure Racing Race as Paul, George, Ringo, or John on the Magical Mystery Tour! You can unlock special vehicles, like the Yellow Submarine. The game ends if Yoko Ono knocks you all off the track.

Capcom vs. Squaresoft This is a fighting game like Marvel vs. Capcom and Capcom vs. SNK. There's all the characters from the Capcom games, such as Street Fighter, Mega Man, Strider, Dark Stalkers, etc. But to counter the new Squaresoft RPG characters, there will also be characters from Capcom's Breath of Fire series, like Ryu, Nina, Ox, Bleu, Bo, Spar, etc. The characters from Squaresoft will be mostly Final Fantasy characters, from the various games, like Cloud, Cecil, Terra, Sabin, Edgar, Squall, etc. There will also be characters from Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross, and other Squaresoft games. The characters' special moves will be some of the same skills and magic attacks that they have in the RPGs.

Don Pachi & Do Don Pachi Don Pachi - A game about a Mexican mafia boss. Do Don Pachi - A game about trying to get it on with a Mexican mafia boss.

Elemental Metal Guilty Gimmick Xeno Gear Bolt Solid Finally! Every game that has "Gear" in the title rolled into one package!

Fire X Emblem You play as Fire X from the Sugarcrave Message Forums and the goal is to get kicked off the board by wearing various hate emblems.

Grade-"E"-us You're part of a group lobbying to get schools to include the letter "E" grade. (Why does it go straight from D to F after all?)

Last Samurai Zombie Nation With contributions from SethraShnoo, jup, & Deathamster You play as Tom Cruise's decapitated head flying through a city destroying buildings! Like an evil Superman, you fly throughout the world's cities, using all those super powers to level all of the humans' achievements in one day. Then you'll have to face the wrath of all those Top Gun dudes in their fighter planes. Bonus level in which you travel around trying to sue anyone who accuses you of being gay.

Milon's Secret Castle RPG Instead of rescuing a princess or saving the world, the goal of this RPG is to FIND A SAW!!

Mini-Game Mania This is a game that takes all the annoying mini-games in RPGs and Adventure games that there ever were, and puts them all in one. The ultimate goal of this game is to annoy the hell out of the player, and make him/her go insane. You'll get the Dartboard game, RC Car Race, Follow the Dog, and Arcade mini-games from Alundra 2. The shooting galleries, Bombchu Bowling, Fishing Pond, Horse Race, and Archery Range of Zelda 64. You'll get the annoying mini-games that I've heard so much about in Final Fantasy 7. You get the digging game and treasure chest house game in Zelda: ALttP. The roulette, slime-fighting, and archery range of Alundra 1 are in here, too (although for mini-games, I thought those were kind of fun.) You also get all of those mini-games from Mystical Ninja Starring Goemon, like the one where Ebisumaru has to collect the sweets, the one where Yae swims up a waterfall, the one where Sasuke leaps up a rotating tower, and the one where Goemon throws boxes on top of giant enemies. By getting high scores on these mini-games, you'll unlock even more mini-games! You'll get all the mini-games from The Legend of the Mystical Ninja (the SNES one). All the Mini-Games from Zelda DX, like the crane game, fishing pond, and river raft. You can even open up some mini-games from sidescrolling action games, such as the crane game, wild west shooting, and egg catching game from Kirby's Adventure! If you win every mini-game, the game cartridge/CD self-destructs.

Ninja Guy Den In this game, you play as one of four guys in a basement who get drunk while watching one too many kung-fu movies and start beating each other up.

Optimus Primal Rage It's another Beast Wars fighting game. The only real difference with this one is that Optimus Primal now has a finishing move where he pees on his defeated opponent.

Organ Battle 64 An amazing strategy RPG where combatants wheel organs and pianos out onto the battefield and duel each other with concertos. Whoever puts on the loudest performance blows the other party away.

Pidge Racer You play as the little punk with the annoying voice from Voltron, as he's converted his Green Lion into a race car. Race against Lotor and King Zarkon to win the galaxy's freedom!

Ratchet and Ratchet The sequel to Ratchet & Clank, and Ratchet & Clank 2, it's Ratchet & Ratchet! You play as either the Autobot Ratchet or Nurse Ratchet. The object is that you're competing against each other to see who can annoy your patients more without actually harming them. As Autobot Ratchet, wrestle with the likes of Ironhide, who doesn't like to be operated on, and threaten to weld his mouth shut. Try not to lose your concentration as the other Autobots stand around and stare at you while you work as they always inexplicably do on the show. Uh-oh, be careful not to ruin Sunstreaker's paint job or you'll lose drastic amounts of points! As Nurse Ratchet, you'll have to annoy your patients by taking away their TV and cigarettes and giving them shock therapy! Watch out for the Indian! Make sure he doesn't throw the sink through the window and escape again! The final stage is a one-on-one Mortal Kombat style fight between a hand-drawn Autobot Ratchet and digitized Nurse Ratchet, who are now both 50-feet-tall to make the fight fair and so that you can knock down buildings. Why? Because, dammit, there are too many people with the name "Ratchet" anymore!

Reggie-Lution 3D With contributions from Kairobi King In this game, you play as a big retarded guy on your way to earning your fifteen minutes of fame. Your ultimate goal is to make a speech at the E3 show. To accomplish this goal, you'll have to kick ass and take names. As you travel along the streets, kicking everyone's asses, you'll have to build up your special powers. For example, earn enough points, and you can be outfitted with eyebeams capable of melting down any X-Box or Playstation2 consoles you see. The three major bosses are Bill Gates, Victor Ireland, and whoever is the president of Sony. You fight them in one-on-one fighting game-style battles. As you fight, a meter builds up, and when the meter is full, you have to press a certain button so you can execute your super-duper "Kicking Ass" move. Then, when your opponent is finished, the screen says "TAKE NAMES!" in big bloody letters accompanied by a Mortal Kombat-like voiceover, and you must input the correct button sequence to take your opponent's name. Along with collecting names from defeated enemies, you can find them other ways, too, like if you find a phone book, then you get a huge "name collection" bonus. Or how about a scene where you go into a restaurant and rip off the employees' nametags? Collecting enough names will prove to Nintendo that you've destroyed their competition and you can make a big speech at E3 on their behalf. Collect all the names in the game, and you get to see the super-secret special ending: An ad for the upcoming Reggie-Lution 3D Part 2, which will pretty much be the same game, only with more names to collect, and heck, you may even have to collect MIDDLE names, too!

Resident Weevil You play as a farmer whose crops have been taken over by giant Boll Weevils and other insects.

Rise of the GoBots Sick of playing second-fiddle to the Transformers and enduring the ridicule of fans, the GoBots rise up and take them on in a one-on-one fighting game whose main claim to fame is having FMV on a cartridge. Except, now it's a CD game, so it doesn't seem so special anymore. And for some reason, you can only play as Leader-1 in the one-player mode. Well, at least it wasn't Scooter.

Rival Turd Play as Hankey the Christmas Poop from South Park in a sidescrolling beat-em-up. You can play this game with Controller Poop.

Tenchi Survivor It's just like the TV, Survivor, except that all the people on the island are the Tenchi girls, and you get to play as one of them. You go through all kinds of adventures on the island, play games, race through obstacle courses, eat bugs, build houses out of walnuts, and do other crazy crap. At the end of each "game week", one of the Tenchi girls is eliminated, and if you did poorly, it might be you. The last Tenchi girl standing is the one that gets to be with Tenchi, forever. You can choose to play as: Ryoko, Ayeka, Mihoshi, Kiyone, Washu, Nagi, Sakuya from Tenchi in Tokyo, and secret bonus character Yuzuha.

Untitled Adventure Game You know how in a lot of RPGs, like the Final Fantasy games, you'll get many different characters to join your party, and some characters come and go, while others stay, etc. But in all adventure games I've played (like Zelda games, where you actually control the main character), you usually only play as one character and keep that character for the entire game. The only exception is Secret of Mana and Evermore, but even in those games you can only switch between just a few characters. Wouldn't it be cool for someone to make an adventure that has lots of characters that would come and go and join your party? And you could switch between controlling them, and they'd all have different skills and/or magic?