GAME IDEAS BY TROY DEMETRIUS

Troy is, hands down, one of the funniest game idea writers we have working for us. He wins the Gold Star! His are some of the best in the archive, and he always has a way of coming to an incredibly funny punchline. Blow Up Bigmouth Billy Bass Funcoland 64 I am Stupid 64 Power Failure 64 Presidential Election 2000 Sit n Spin 64 Trailer Park 64

Blow Up Bigmouth Billy Bass The object of this game is to buy a rifle and go to every department and toy store that sells these things and blow up as many as you can within the time limit. You score extra points for blowing up the ones that are conveniently located near the checkout counters, where little kids think it's fun to run up and push the buttons on them, and make the damn things sing over and over again, the whole time you're waiting in line!

Funcoland 64 In this game you play as yourself, and the object is to go around destroying Funcoland stores!! Starting in your home-town, you are on a cross-country trip to eliminate all Funcolands from the face of the planet! Some of the tasks you must complete are as follows: 1. Go to the store and punch out any worker who says there's no such thing as an unlicensed NES game. 2. Punch out the store worker when he tells someone they don't have a game in stock, when there's like, ten of them on the shelf. Or punch him out if he tries to sell someone a game he/she doesn't want, then give the person the game they want in either scenario. 3. Make a bonfire in the middle of the store out of the cleaning kits. 4. Tie up and gag the store workers in the back room and put a huge sign in the window that says all of their overpriced games are now only 50 cents!! Once you have gotten all games and customers out of the store, you can trash it and burn it down! Then you move on to the next store, then the next until you've got 'em all baby!! But you must be quick and get out of the store before the cops come, or else you're toast! Your score will increase depending on how much of the store you destroyed and how many games you got out safely before the cops arrived.

I am Stupid 64 In this game you do the dumbest thing possible to earn points. Here are some things you can do: 1. Run with scissors. 2. Stick your fingers in electrical outlets. 3. Stick a fork inside a toaster 4. Lay down in the middle of the street 5. Tease the neighbor's pit bull 6. Play with sharp objects 7. Stick thumbtacks up your nose 8. Throw a banana peel on the floor and slide on it 9. Stick your face in a bowl of pudding 10. Run your underwear up a flagpole (extra points if you do it while you're still wearing them) 11. Lick an eggbeater, while it's still plugged in 12. Stick your tie in a paper shredder 13. Pinch a female karate instructor's behind 14. Carhop a police vehicle 15. Drive through red lights 16. Streak 17. Make crank phone calls to the FBI 18. Walk barefoot through poison ivy 19. Watch three straight hours of those "Millionaire" rip-offs, like Survivor and Big Brother 20. Walk into an asylum wearing nothing but a ski mask and a diaper screaming, "The Eggplants are coming!!"

Power Failure 64 In this game, it is your job to single-handedly screw up California, and eventually, the entire US economy. How do you do this? You start by declaring the power company a monopoly, and break it up. You make a promise to Californians that new companies will rise up and give people more choices, thus lowering the cost of energy. Of course, those so-called "new companies" don't exist, but you're not going to tell the people that until each and every power grid goes down. This will effectively wipe out Silicon Valley, and cost the US economy billions of dollars. Soon, there will be brownouts and blackouts all across America. People in CA will riot in the streets, and all that movement will cause an enormous earthquake, which will plunge CA into the depths of the ocean, never to be seen again. Oh, wait...I have friends in CA..Maybe this game wasn't such a good idea after all. 0o

Presidential Election 2000 In this game, you reenact the US Presidential Election of 2000. You get to play as either George W. Bush or Al Gore. The objects of the game are as follows: 1. Try not to make yourself look like a total ass in public. 2. If playing as Bush, try your best to talk in complete sentences. 3. If playing as Gore, try your best to cover up your bald spot. 4. Convince people you invented the internet. 5. Make subliminal ads and then claim you didn't do it. 6. Rig the voting booths. 7. Drag the election on for as long as possible. All the while you'll be staving off the attacks of Ralph Nader and Pat Buchanan, and a group of old ladies who can't see. The winner gets Elian.

Sit n Spin 64 In this game you are a grown man (or woman) and the object is to try to fit on a Sit N Spin toy, and spin around as many times as possible before you get dizzy and pass out, or throw up. If you sit on the Sit N Spin and break it, you lose points. In fact, here's a rundown of the scoring system: 1. If you're even able to fit on the Sit N Spin - 100 pts. 2. For each successful spin - 10 pts. 3. Falling off - -20 pts. 4. Spinning so fast you lauch yourself into orbit - 500 pts! 5. Getting sick and throwing up - -30 pts. 6. Getting sick and throwing up on an opponent - 200 pts! 7. Passing out - -10 pts. 8. Passing out, but still spinning on the Sit N Spin - an extra 20 pts. added for each spin! 9. Breaking the Sit N Spin - -50 pts. 10. Breaking the Sit N Spin over an opponent's head - +100 pts! Special Bonus Round where you get to slip and break your neck on a Slip N Slide.

Trailer Park 64 This is a first-person shooter game like Goldeneye, only it's set in a trailer park. You get to go around blowing up people's potted plants. You have to watch out for women with curlers in their hair chasing you with a rolling pin. Extra points if you marry a relative.