A few game ideas from our good friend, Pero (Paul V.)
  • The Far Side Game
  • Video Game Character Has-Beens Tournament Fighting

  • The Far Side Game

    This one of those games like Dragon's Lair or Myst in which you have to figure out what to do in each room, but each room is based on a Far Side comic. Like, in one, you're a cow inside a giant cowball. And in another, you're a spider scaring the webbing out of another spider.

    Video Game Character Has-Beens Tournament Fighting

    In the spirit of Super Smash Bros, this is a tournament fighting game for the N64 featuring all the characters from games past, who either bombed, flopped, or faded into oblivion. These characters include:

    Pero the Cat - Once the official mascot of Toei, who made some of the crappiest games ever, Pero symbolizes how NOT to make a video game. His special moves are kicking people with his boots, a popgun that fires a very slow bullet, a boomerang, and his oversized hat.

    Kuros - From the long-gone series, Wizards and Warriors, Kuros's special ability is to bounce around out of control, falling off cliffs, and getting hit by unidentified flying objects.

    Kid Icarus - As Pit, you have to try not to get turned into an eggplant (which I chalk up as one of the most disturbing sights ever, in videogames, only to be outdone by Darunia's dancing in Zelda 64.) He can fly, use a bow and arrow, and fall off the bottom of the screen, yelling, "I'm finsihed!"

    Master Higgins - The nervous little fat guy from the Adventure Island series. He can ride over enemies on a skateboard and club them with his stone axe. The downside of using him, is that he has to eat constantly during the battle to keep up his energy. Or else he passes out from low blood sugar.

    The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - They're now the Middle-Aged Mutant Ninja Turtles. All four function as one character. Each time you lose 1/4 of your life bar, the next Turtle takes over. They can still use all their Ninja weapons, but they move a little slower now, and need to take heart medicine after battles.

    The Bad Dudes - I forget their names. Actually, you only play as one of the Bad Dudes. The other Bad Dude hosts the tournament. At the beginning of each game he says, "This tournament has been taken over by Has-Beens. Are you a bad enough dude to win the tournament?" If you play as the other Bad Dude, you can beat your opponents up with your bare hands. If you win, he says, "I'm bad!", and it sounds just like it did on the NES.

    Little Mac - Whatever happened to this guy? Why wasn't he in Super Punch-Out? God, he dethrones Mike Tyson, and gets nothing? What do you have to do to be in the sequel? Anyway, his special ability is to be three sizes smaller than the rest of his opponents, and yet still be able to leap up and hit them in the face.

    Stanley the Bugman - From Donkey Kong 3. He runs around spraying people's asses with bug repellant. That's about it.

    Special bonus round where you get to shoot the dog from Duck Hunt.

    Additional Character Ideas:

    From Minerva K Red:

    Astyanax - His special weapons are:
    A small axe about the size of a hairdryer
    A sword about the same size
    Something that resembles a curling iron

    Unlike Little Mac, he is three times larger than most video game characters, and walks like RoboCop!

    Jim from Hydlide - Jim is the toughest video game character ever! He can die a million times and he still keeps trying! His special ability is to walk around fighting without ever using a weapon, or even moving his body at all.

    Kabuki Quantum Fighter - He's a ballet dancer who uses his hair for a weapon.

    The Dork from Seal of the Pharaoh - Do they just have to be NES characters, or can it be 3DO characters, too? His only weapon is a small stick that he throws at his enemies. It takes five or six sticks to destroy one measly little grasshopper.

    Fred the Frog from Blaster Master - I think Fred should get his own game. I mean, he was doused with radiation. Maybe it gave him some special powers like the Ninja Turtles.

    From Crawl and 1000:

    Mike from StarTropics - When he's weak he could be like in StarTropics 1: barely manoeuverable and uses a weak yo-yo. When powered-up, he could be like in StarTropics 2, and use a psychic attack, and be able to make diagonal jumps.

    From Deathspork:

    Pauline from Donkey Kong - Pauline could cry for help really loud and bust opponents' eardrums.

    Wart from Super Mario Bros. 2 - The king of all one-time stars. He would have a large range of moves like spitting bubbles and doing suplexes, but he'd have a natural weakness to vegetables.

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